Howdy Freelancers! This week we have a really fun Fashion Friday. Over on Twitter ThatMummaRocks asked fans to post their ugly Javelin designs for her to enjoy, and I just had to get in on that. So here are the ugly Javelins that made it into the thread.

As always, if you want to get your ugly Javelin design into this article, do the following: email me on, message me on Twitter @GuyAnthem or on Instagram @thatguywhoplaysanthem.


I called this Javelin Playdough because someone else already did in the thread. Man, this thing is not pretty, and I can’t say that I even like it because of that, it’s awful! to quite one person on Twitter, it’s like a child has smushed all of their playdough colours together, never to be separated again.


I have Scottish heritage on both sides of my family, and this is too much for even me. I like that this pattern has been used, but my god doesn’t it just look like the clan who were at the back of the line when tartans were being handed out just made a full body suit?

Action Ranger £19.99

Someone in the thread named this one, Action Ranger £19.99. You can see why though. It looks like Optimus Prime got thrown against a wall really hard, and put back together with whatever was hanging around on the floor, like pens and spare tyres for Lego cars.

Press A
Press A

This one is called Press A, because nothing this unappealing deserves a name. I can’t think of a better way to create an ugly Javelin than to do what has bene done here, add a different texture, material, and series of colours to every segment of the build.

Kill Me

This design, Kill Me, is one I’m on board with. It looks like the pilot got captured by the Scar, and tried to assimilate with them. Eventually they fell in love with one of them, but inside they knew they didn’t fit. Now they don’t fit with either race, and need to be exterminated. Someone please put it down.

I’m So Pretty
I’m So Pretty
I’m So Pretty

Named I’m So Pretty, by the creator, this thing is far from pretty. I can’t tell you much about it because it hurst my eyes to look at it. I hope you enjoy scrolling past this one, I sure do.


This one ThatMummaRocks named herself, Crispy. I can totally see why, no other word really describes the Colossus you see before you. It’s like someone took a soldier in tactical gear, put them in a deep fat fryer, and went home for the weekend. On Monday this is what was left, and it’s not even worth killing. I think with that much fat on the skin all around it, nothing can penetrate the armour.

That’s it for this week’s Fashion Friday. Be sure to let me know what you thought in the comments. I’d like to thank ThatMummaRocks for doing what she does with the community, and keep on requesting awful things like this, they’re great!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.